As you can see and if you have followed this blog over the past year you know, i have joined a circle of incredible women and am forever grateful to be a part of this. these women speak my language. they FEEL every moment of their lives, the good, the bad, the frustrating and the so happy you can’t catch your breath ones. AND THEY SHARE THEM. these letters will move you through a range of emotions and be prepared to cry a little laugh a little and just plain ol feel grateful for your blessings. As you will see our lives are so very different and so very awesome in our own ways, in fact we are located all over the world..but we all share one simple common thread, we love our baby girls with every ounce of us. and after all i can’t imagine a better thing to share.
TO SEE LAST MONTH’S POST CLICK HERE
and don’t stop here please please continue on through our circle and head over to my amazing friend KIRSTY of KIRSTY LARAMOUR PHOTOGRAPHY…her images will truly make your heart go pitter patter…
my sweet girls…
as you can imagine this letter, (okay most letters but who’s counting) is (are) very difficult for me to write…mainly because i am an “over emotional” person, at least i am by society’s standards. i tend to live in extremes when it comes to emotions and as daddy says ” i never allow myself to live in the middle”… but you know i’ve always been this way, for as long as i can remember, there are time over the years i try to hide it, but i can’t. i just can’t suppress the dramatic swing from up to down. its who i am. And i know that monday, when you BOTH start school, this swing, that safety chain will snap, it will no doubt grab me straight in the heart and i will begin a free fall of sorts.
It’s funny, with both of you starting real school, kindergarten and first grade, the past 5 and 6 years of your lives have flashed before my eyes. i have found myself second guessing every single minute of those years, wondering what i could have changed, what i should have savored in, or how i could have slowed it down….every.single.minute. I am amazed by the simple fact that everything and every day that was my life BEFORE YOU seems so insignificant, so colorless, so quiet. i can truly say i remember more from the last 6 years of my life than from the 27 years before that. and THAT is why i have to remind myself that along the way WE DID EVERYTHING RIGHT…not perfect, not right for somebody else but just right for US! while this seems like a pretty bold statement to make, its the the truth and i know this because of where we are today. you see we wouldn’t be exactly where we are at right now, today, if we have done anything differently.
As i sit here hating “time” and the speed with which the clock seems to turn i try to remember that time is only a villain if you forget that memories will NEVER truly fade for us and experiences always produce strength. So while i know monday will hurt, i know i will cry (ALOT), i also know i have to trust in the memories we have made and the experiences that have yet to come. and on monday the speed with which times passes will be in my favor!
i know you are scared babies, mommy is scared too…CHANGE is scary but TOGETHER we can do ANYTHING…